The reviews are in for ‘Venom’ and wow, this movie sounds horrendously bad

Premiere of 'Venom' - Arrivals

Yesterday’s lead story in the links post was about how Lady Gaga’s baby monsters are trying to come for Venom’s wig. Venom and A Star Is Born are being released this week, and the Monsters want ASIB to be a big, major hit. It’s worth noting that, generally speaking, the films are supposed to appeal to different consumers. My guess is that ASIB’s core audience will skew towards women and people over 25. Venom’s core audience will be made up of boys and men – teenagers and dudes in their early 20s. But that hasn’t stopped the Little Monsters from trying to dissuade people from going to see Venom. But as several commentators pointed out though, Venom is perfectly capable of crashing and burning on its own.

There was an embargo on Venom’s reviews, and the embargo was lifted yesterday. Now we know why there was an embargo: Venom is most likely utter garbage. At Rotten Tomatoes, the all-critics score for Venom is 28%. The top-critics score is… 23%. The reviews are horrendous. Random thoughts from critics: “Venom may very well be the dumbest movie of the year,” “overwhelmingly mediocre film,” “It’s a mess, but wow, is it ever a fun, fascinating mess,” and “The first act of ‘Venom’ suggests we’re in for one of the worst films of 2018. Not in a fun way, mind you, but in that dull, dispiriting way where the lack of effort starts to feel like disrespect.”

For what it’s worth, The Hollywood Reporter’s box-office prognosticators say that Venom will likely open with $57-65 million, and ASIB will likely debut with $30 million.

The World Premiere of “VENOM”

Photos courtesy of WENN.

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42 Responses to “The reviews are in for ‘Venom’ and wow, this movie sounds horrendously bad”

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  1. Herewegoagain says:

    I’d still rather see it over A Star is Born.

    • Josephine says:

      I’m not going to see a Star is Born because it’s not my kind of movie, but I thought that the preview was very promising. On the other hand, Venom is my kind of movie (and I like Tom Hardy) and I thought the preview was very lackluster, and I probably won’t see it. Who knows how accurate the previews are, but I do think the acting looked solid in ASIB.

    • jessamine says:

      Same, even though ASIB looks like it deserves its critical acclaim it’s not my thing. But probably I will end up seeing neither and maybe catching Venom on Netflix sometime.

  2. Lightpurple says:

    I don’t want to see either. Venom has a good cast but that CGI thing repulses me. I hated the other 3 ASIB but I’m being dragged to see it tonight.

  3. OG Cleo says:

    Riz Ahmed’s face in the last picture though…

  4. Case says:

    I just said out loud, “Of course it’s bad!”

    I don’t know what they were thinking making a standalone villain origin story film where Spiderman can never be included. Venom is a really cool villain, and a beloved villain, but much like the Han Solo movie, no one asked for this. If Marvel wanted to integrate Venom into their Spiderman series at some point — great! But this route was just not smart.

    • Suze says:

      To be fair, this isn’t Marvel, its Sony. Venom is not part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, it is the first movie in what Sony is calling the “Spiderverse”. I think Mysterio is up next? Basically a whole bunch of movies about characters from the Spiderman comics, but no Spiderman himself.

  5. Sutcliffe says:

    Without any desire to defend either of these flaming dumpster fires, the idea of citing Rotten Tomatoes is unreasonably offensive. It is an utterly useless system owned by NBC and Warner Bros. I have ZERO clue why anyone bothers to even use the site, let alone convince themselves that it serves any purpose other than promoting its owners interests.

    • Dara says:

      Huh, I didn’t know WB had a stake in Rotten Tomatoes. That explains some of the films that got good scores and others that got bad – for no rational reason I could find. I’ve never let a lousy RT score prevent me from seeing a film I was really excited to see, but it has persuaded me into skipping some I was meh about to begin with.

      • Ruru says:

        Metacritic is better. It’s based on numerical scores out of 100, while Rotten Tomatoes is just good vs. bad. So if a review is “meh” RT can’t accurately capture it, but Metacritic can (“meh” = 50/100).

    • Jay (the Canadian one) says:

      Since Rotten Tomatoes is an aggregator (averaging the reviews of independent review sources) how do you propose WB can insert bias into the scores? Being selectively biased on which reviewers get tallied on a per-movie basis would be easy to catch.

  6. T.Fanty says:

    I’m going to say it right now: more often than not, Tom Hardy does not make great movies. He does a lot of good supporting roles (Dunkirk, whichever Batman one that was, Tinker, Tailor, Inception), and he has some great performances, but there is maybe more garbage than there is gold. And Taboo was darn near unwatchable.

    • Millenial says:

      I love him, but his role in Peaky Blinders really made me question that love. Accent is horrible. Acting is terrible. Anyways, I’m not sure I’m going to see this.

    • Ponytail says:

      Oh god, Taboo. I’d wiped that from my mind, but I’m now reminded of that hat, that bloody hat…

      • Dee Kay says:

        I thought I would love Taboo, it is my genre and I like Hardy and I thought it would tackle British colonialism head-on. And it sucked. Sooooo boring. Sooooo dumb. Terrible plotting and dialogue and characters. What a waste.

    • Polly says:

      Taboo was atrocious and borderline offensive.

      • Chelsea says:

        ‘ive got a use for you’ haha. My husband and I laugh about that line. But I’ll watch anything with Tom Hardy in it, he is fine.

      • balehead2012 says:

        I actually loved Taboo and can’t wait for a second season. Just out of curiosity: what was offensive about it? (really interested in your opinion, maybe I’ve missed sth. while watching it?!)

      • Polly says:

        @balehead2012 Sorry there’s no arrow thing to respond to your comment so I’m putting it here. It’s not a great idea to have a blue-eyed, blond(-ish) haired white guy play a mixed-race character especially when the character has clearly only been given that particular racial background to make him more “exotic” and give him vague supernatural powers. I genuinely don’t get how no one realised how tone-deaf they were being. The way Native American and African spirituality is presented is embarrassingly stereotypical and shallow, just a way to make the protagonist more interesting because he’s monosyllabic most of the time, and then there’s the awful treatment of Zilpha who was raped, beaten and tortured only to commit suicide when James Delaney rejected her. The only reason I continued watching the show till the end was because I wanted to see what would happen to her. The cinematography was gorgeous and the acting was great but personally I just really hated the story itself. That’s just my two cents.

      • balehead2012 says:

        Thank you for your answer!

    • laura-j says:

      I love Tom Hardy, but all Taboo made me do was perfect a strong walk with an overcoat blowing behind me.

    • bears says:

      Most of the roles I’ve seen Tom Hardy in are ones that never seemed to make much of a ruckus but they were some of the best roles he’s played and really showcased his talent as an actor. Bronson, The Drop, Wuthering Heights (if you’re a literature geek, you’ll probably agree that he makes a damned fine Heathcliff). He’s got the chops. But he seems to be one of those actors who just takes jobs because they “seem fun”. He doesn’t seem to give that much care to his potential award nominations or that sort of thing. Or maybe that’s all posturing. Who really knows.

  7. Jegede says:

    I’ve actually heard from friends that it’s not bad at all.

    A fun movie, that’s not deserving of the opprobrium being heaped on it.

  8. Kittycat says:

    I’m hearing its terrible.

    More reason for me to see it!

  9. Incredulous says:

    You mean making a scary body horror movie that you then chop up to PG it smooth results in incoherent trash? Well, I never!

    • Sigh... says:

      Didn’t even Hardy say the best FORTY MINUTES had been cut? They should’ve went/made/stuck with an “adult” supervillain horror flick (the first?), ESPECIALLY since released this time of year. “Logan” and “Deadpool (to a degree)” went anti-Marvel/Disney formula and flourished.

  10. AnotherDirtyMartini says:

    It looks awful. Like the cast though. But I wouldn’t watch it for free.

  11. Isadora says:

    My brother got to see it in a preview yesterday . He messaged me this morning that he had a great time with the movie. So i’m taking his word that the movie is not that bad. Not that i’m planning to see it any time soon. I’m taking a break from superhero or supervillain movies for that matter.

  12. Sherry says:

    Do people really still pay attention to what critics think? Venom is pure escapism – it’s totally fun, and Tom Hardy is great in it.

  13. Mona says:

    I watched it and it is everything you can expect from such a theme. Dumb, switch your brain off, enjoy the CGI, the music and stupid jokes. It is nothing breakthrough in either way good or bad. It’s a simple stupid comic movie. End of story. So if you look forward to be simply entertained for a while, go watch it if you are a fan of this genre. If not you can still go and get entertained. Just don’t expect a life changing experience. And this counts for all the movies of this genre…

    • bears says:

      Well said. You just described every superhero & anti-hero comic book based movie that has ever been released. Even the ones that try to bridge the gap with a plot and some semi-developed characters.

  14. Dee Kay says:

    I predicted 33% on Rotten Tomatoes for this movie and it came in even lower. I will never see this even for free but actually the reviews made it sound like it could be a so-bad-it’s-good kind of experience, which works for many people. The trailers made it look not-fun at all.

  15. ChristineM says:

    I could care less what the critics think. It’s a comic book movie and I am all in for the escapism. My son is very excited to see the movie and we will go this weekend. I’m sure we will enjoy it for what it is too. I’m not expecting Oscar caliber material duh!!

  16. shirurusu says:

    I wish Tom Hardy would stop putting masks over his beautiful face and muffling his voice in every god damn movie! Thing over his face in Batman, in Mad Max, in Dunkirk! (pilot-thing) and now he’s covered in black SNOT!!?? GIVE ME A BREAK TOM HARDY!

    Actually I’m gonna rewatch Mad Max for Charlize right now, she’s so awesome in it!

    • bears says:

      Every time he makes a movie, I’m reminded of the ‘really wish Hollywood would let my man Tom Hardy breathe’ meme..

  17. past says:

    Watched Venom a couple of hours ago, still not over how awesome is that movie. Went in with no expectations whatsoever (was informed about bad reviews, so didn’t expected much), was pleasantly surprised. Yep, it’s a comicbook movie, and yep the plot is simple, basic, but Eddie/Venom duo is awesome, Tom Hardy MAKES this movie, there’s so much fun in there. And yeah, if it wasn’t for Tom, I’m pretty sure the movie wouldn’t be watchable, pretty much. That case when acting saves the shitty plot.

  18. Lizzy says:

    I saw Venom last night in a fully packed movie theatre and I thought it was good entertainment.

    Yeah, this movie is not going to pull in the Oscar noms nor will it change anyones life but its good entertainment and that is what superhero movies are all about.

    • bears says:

      They should have called this movie,”Tom Hardy wants to make sure his kid goes to college”.

  19. Crassino Royale says:

    I wish Venom makes some cash, if only so that Michelle Williams can afford to show up at her next premiere wearing something other than grandma’s Christmas table-runner. #DressMess

  20. FF says:

    Venom’s still going to make money. The visual effects look like Venom, and, well… Tom Hardy: the fanboys will have his back, hardcore.

    The character has a strong edgelord contingent fanbase, and it can always improve the weak writing with a sequel and a better director.

    It’s still better than Venom in Spiderman 3 and that’s all it really needs to achieve.

    There are more badly-written blockbusters out there than not, so bad ones with fan fave actors can come off okay if the visuals are good enough to make you forget – even when they and the characters make zero damned sense in the established story.

    And for the record, don’t blame Marvel Studios for that.

  21. Bread and Circuses says:

    It still sounds like this movie might be really great trash. And I have much affection for really great trash.