Open Post: The Kavanaugh-Ford hearing has begun, and it’s already difficult

Embed from Getty Images

Obviously, everything has shut down today because everyone in America is glued to the Brett Kavanaugh-Christine Blasey Ford hearing, which started at 10 am. Gossip is dead, as is America. So let’s talk about the opening statement from the chairman from Judiciary Committee, Sen. Chuck Grassley, whose opening statement can be summarized this way:

Grassley was disgusting, and the perfect example for why the cowardly Republicans had to outsource their constitutional responsibilities to a female prosecutor. Grassley was so tone-deaf to ALL women with his opening statement. As for Diane Feinstein, the ranking Democrat on the committee, she was great.

Mostly, I just want to say… I respect Dr. Ford so much and I’m sitting here crying as she tells her story. She’s brave and a patriot and she deserves so much respect.

Anyway, this isn’t a live blog but CB and I are tweeting about the hearing – you can follow us here and here.

Embed from Getty Images

Photos courtesy of Getty.

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

281 Responses to “Open Post: The Kavanaugh-Ford hearing has begun, and it’s already difficult”

Comments are Closed

We close comments on older posts to fight comment spam.

  1. Indiana Joanna says:

    Grassley was glib, patronizing and rude. He tilted towards Sen. Feinstein while she had her turn to give her statement in a threatening way, something he wouldn’t do to fellow ancient woman hater Hatch.

    • Harryg says:

      He is so rude and seems almost demented.

      • emma says:

        Am so triggered by this whole charade that am trying my best to ignore it. I was driving with my hubby at 7.30 am and listening to NPR and the gaslighting from one of the news shows has pissed me off so bad.
        I can’t even handle this day.

      • Melanie says:

        Morning edition was gaslighting? I’m so sorry.

      • pippilongdivision says:

        This morning on the way to work I was regretting that I wouldn’t get a chance to watch/listen (middle school marches on), but I was disappointed by that NPR report too. Now I’m reading through a bit of this during lunch, I am ridiculously grateful re: my sanity/emotional state that l that I have to try to teach rowdy adolescents the history of atomic theory all day and have to watch this after the fact. Professor Ford is a hero, and my heart and fury are on her side and the side of those watching.

      • Mac says:

        FFS, Kavanaugh claims the allegations against him are revenge for the Clintons. Beyond the insanity of that claim, it should be immediately disqualifying. His obvious partisanship proves he cannot be fair and impartial. He should not be sitting on any bench.

    • Mac says:

      Rachel Mitchell is either a terrible prosecutor or she simply could not punch holes in Dr. Ford’s testimony, And since Mitchell is a decorated prosecutor, I’m thinking it is the latter.

      • Nancy says:

        I just read on twitter, Chris Wallace of Fox News: This is going to be a disaster for the Republications! Man, that made me so happy. You can’t break Dr. Ford. She is a force. She is not on trial, OMG. What got me is when she said she had a second front door. This POS lays on her, she thinks she will be raped or possibly killed, and to this day needs a second door to escape him. This woman is speaking for any of us who ever were in a situation such as hers, whether it was yesterday or fifty years ago. I cannot bestow enough praise for Dr. Ford’s bravery and resolve. Don’t get sad ladies, get mad. Vote. I stand with Christine Blasey Ford. *For the record, Wallace stated two of his adult daughters told him incidents that occurred to them in high school that they were too embarrassed to tell him then.* Thank you Ms. Ford on behalf of all survivors of sexual abuse.

  2. Jan90067 says:

    I can not only feel her fear, but feel my own creeping up. I feel agitated and upset; feel like throwing up right now. How can anyone listen to this and not feel the same!

    I’ve already taken 2 grams of Ativan, and still am on the edge of crying. I’m shaking. HOW CAN ANYONE NOT BELIEVE HER???

    • Anastasia says:

      Yeah, just reading about it and seeing little clips on my conference period were enough to give me a massive stomach ache. I experienced the same things these women did in HS and college, and it’s so hard to relive it all and as salt in the wound, to watch her being treated this way and disbelieved.

      I simultaneously want to cry and scream and break things.

    • Birdix says:

      Agreed. It’s so hard to listen to, and see her pain from reliving it.

    • Jan90067 says:

      It’s taken me almost 50 yrs. to tell my now 90 yr. old dad of an assault that happened to me when I was 12, walking home from school. And while (thank God it wasn’t rape), it was shocking and traumatic. This morning was the 2nd time I mentioned it, when he came into the room and saw me shaking, almost in tears, watching Dr. Ford. I think he *finally* is starting to “get” why a girl/woman won’t say something at the time of assault.

      I’m STILL shaking as I type this, and I just want to full out bawl… and while I’m surprised at the strength of my feelings at this time, I’m not surprised at the same time. When you repress something for so long, it’s bound to come out, Vesuvius style, at some point.

    • Louisa says:

      I really think they do believe her. They just don’t care. What she went through is no big deal to them.

      • Rachelina says:

        Agree 100%. They don’t give a damn if he did it or not. Disgusting.

      • Agirlandherdog says:

        And you nailed it. For them, it doesn’t even matter if she’s telling the truth. She doesn’t even matter to them. They have their agenda, and they’ll stick to it come hell or high water.

      • Amy says:

        Or they themselves have hurt people in the past.

      • otaku fairy... says:

        Agreed. If Kavanaugh gets confirmed after all of this, it will mainly be because they don’t care, not because his victims aren’t believable. Two days ago two of my co-workers and I were talking about what a bad message some of the responses to this situation-plus Trump’s win- sends to boys/ young guys. It doesn’t send a good message to girls either, if you think about it.

    • Cate says:

      I was going to watch but then I read some of the coverage and it mentioned that four girls from her high school were in one of the legislative buildings, in their uniforms, holding hands, and for reason that put me over the edge. I’ve been able to stay mostly functional through all this because my own assault is in the past and I’m much “safer” now (I’m older, I’m married, I have a job where I’m not expected to interact with male co-workers in ways that could put me in danger…I have some power now and most of the men I know or interact with regularly have plenty to lose by behaving badly), so it’s almost like my assault happened to someone else, not me. But shit, hearing that there are YOUNG GIRLS showing up to this just brings it right back. THEY are still vulnerable. And I don’t have any confidence that they are going to get the right message from our (Republican) elected officials today.

      • Christin says:

        When I think back to the 1980s and 1990s, I wonder if we’ve made any real progress. It was the mid-1990s before my co-workers and I ever had any harassment training (and this was at a very large company).

        We had no idea what we were expected to tolerate, both from co-workers and customers. We experienced quite a bit of verbal abuse, both from old school bosses and (mostly older) customers. And we would mostly just take it, in fear of losing our jobs.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      I’ve cried 3 times this morning. The worst thing is hearing people defend/minimize assault on social media. It’s times like these that show how absolutely terrible some of our fellow citizens are.

      • Juls says:

        I live in the area in TN where the VP of a high school posted a video yesterday of himself telling the boys that “the girls ruin everything” re: the dress code and even brought up Eve eating the damn apple. The number of people, even some people I consider friends, defending him on Facebook was disgusting. I was fighting with people for hours over it and just gave up because I was being viciously attacked for being against him.

      • Tiffany :) says:

        That’s terrible, Juls! Wow, truly awful.

  3. Michel says:

    When will these old men die!

    • homeslice says:

      The fact that 3 of the old coots were there during Anita Hill tells me we need TERM LIMITS!

    • Anastasia says:

      He actually looks like an ancient evil little snake.

    • GingerCrunch says:

      It’s the only glimmer of hope I have for the US coming out of these dark ages. Can’t happen soon enough.

    • Jerusha says:

      Not soon enough.

    • Anastasia says:

      The problem is there are new ones. Young ones, who don’t believe in getting consent. They’re still around, and they’re 13, 14, 15 years old and up. Hopefully with the new awareness this younger generations of girls have (and they really do), it’ll be different for them, but have no doubt there are still boys being raised with these old patriarchal ideas.

      • Melanie says:

        I for one am trying so hard to raise my son and daughter to know about consent and bodily autonomy. I want them to know so that they understand how to treat others and how they should expect to be treated. I think a lot of the reason that women don’t come forward right away is that so much of the behavior has been normalized. We have been taught so many bad messages about sexual assault. We’ve been taught we can ask for it, what happened wasn’t that bad and that we should think about what speaking out will do to our perpetrators. It’s a very sad state of affairs. I know not all parents are, I know a woman in front of her child on MSNBC said that groping wasn’t that big of a deal, but I have some hope that this is a watershed moment and many parents are trying to teach better values for their sons and daughters.

  4. Bob says:

    She is so brave!

  5. Keaton says:

    I think she did amazing. Very compelling and very sincere.

  6. elvie says:

    She is amazing. She is so composed. I’m sitting at my desk trying not to cry.

  7. homeslice says:

    I want to give her a hug. There is no one with a eyes or ears that can deny that this woman is speaking the truth.

    • paranormalgirl says:

      …and yet they do. A lot of women included.

      • Melanie says:

        And what kind of woman signs a letter saying that someone didn’t assault you in response to another woman saying that person did? Just because he didn’t assault you doesn’t mean he never assaulted anyone.

  8. Sam says:

    She looks petrified. The treatment of women is abhorrent. I am disgusted.

    All this tells me is that women don’t matter. America truly is for white men and everyone else is a guest.

    • Embee says:

      You’ve shaken me with this truth.

    • Jess says:

      Holy cow, Sam, your last line sums up our problem perfectly. I’ve struggled with how to explain how horrific America’s treatment of various groups is and you’ve summed it up perfectly in one sentence. I hope you don’t mind but I’m going to steal it and repeat it ad nauseum.

    • Anastasia says:

      Of course it is, and it always has been. Some white women have deluded themselves into thinking we’re allowed at that table, too, but we’re not, and never have been.

      Women and people of color are going to have to TAKE those seats at the table by FORCE. They will NEVER be offered to us. Ever.

    • PodyPo says:

      I was married to a white male Chamber of Commerce exec for years and watched the Good Ol Boy network in operation for years. I suppose I thought it extended to me by association. I have been fortunate and am so grateful to be fairly unscathed by dominant male attitudes in my career and life, but this hearing is bringing me such pain for all women who have suffered for no reason other than the genetics of their birth. Let us all stand together and in numbers we can create changes.

    • JayneBirkinB says:

      So heart breaking to read these comments and know that they are unavoidably true.

  9. Christin says:

    I hope someone brings up the yearbook bio. Ask the choir boy about those entries.

    Of all the qualified people in the country, is this the best we can do? That goes for some of our elected officials as well as this nominee.

  10. Kitten says:

    This is OT but I just have to say this: I’ve been dreading today since they announced it. I knew it would be so painful, not just for Dr. Ford, but for any survivor.
    Tangentially, last night I found out that my uncle fell off a ladder and is in a coma and just three minutes ago, I found out he has passed away.
    My Trump-supporting uncle who was always my favorite as a kid because he was hilarious and always made me feel special.

    Every year he sends all the members of our family a really funny newsletter talking about what everyone has been up to. It’s always filled with lively stories and hilarious anecdotes and always brings a smile to my face.
    Last December I didn’t even open it. Furious that he still supported Trump, I threw it right in the trash.

    Now I wish I could get that letter back.

    I’m leaving work because I’m a mess and I can’t concentrate and will have to fly out to California this weekend. I’m not sure if I’ll see the rest of this hearing but it’s probably for the best as emotionally, this is about the max I can handle. My BF (a paramedic) always reminds me how life can change in an instant. Yesterday my uncle was getting ready to do some simple repairs on his RV and now less than 19 hours later he is gone.

    I’m rambling now but just….hug your loved ones. That’s all I can say–hug your loved ones.

    • Laughysaphy says:

      I’m so so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself in the coming days.

    • K2 says:

      I’m so sorry, Kitten.

    • Birdix says:

      So sorry to hear about your uncle, Kitten. Sending hugs.

    • Clumsyme says:

      I am so sorry for your loss Kitten. Sending you lots and lots of hugs.

    • Who ARE these people? says:

      Sending sympathy for your loss. It’s okay that you were angry about his electoral choices. Good luck with your trip.

      • Lilly says:

        Yes, @kitten I agree with @Who ARE these people that it’s okay you were angry. The caring, loving grown-ups in our lives, that were there for us as we developed usually have enough love to bear our anger. I’ve been that for my kids, and various others, because I love them enough them to hold it, even when it’s misplaced. Your uncle knew you loved him and the choices he made were frustrating. Life is and we can’t always subdue ourselves just in case. Condolences to you.

        Back to the topic – all survivors take care of yourself today. I believe you and I’m sending love.This entire thing is triggering and I’m in tears and I can’t even watch, but I’m reading. These white men in charge are so scared and won’t do the right thing for the sake of it, but us voters need to remember and vote.

    • Nicegirl says:

      I’m so sorry Kitten. Please take care.

    • Jan90067 says:

      So very, very sorry for your loss, Kitten. Please take comfort in your memories of your uncle “Pre-Trump”. Remember the way he’d make you laugh and smile, and let that be his legacy to you, not the aberration of the last two years.

      Sending love and healing hugs to you {{{{{🤗❤️🤗}}}}}}

      • lucy2 says:

        Agree completely. Kitten, you do have wonderful memories of him, and that’s how you should choose to remember him. It’s not easy though, and I am so sorry for your loss.

    • Erinn says:

      Love you, Kitten. Take as much time for yourself as you can – I know you’ll probably be pretty busy with family, but do try to take at least a moment or two for yourself. <3<3<3

    • Christin says:

      Kitten, sudden loss is so hard on the family. Take care, and don’t be hard on yourself.

    • Esmom says:

      Oh, Kitten, so sorry for your loss. May your memories with him be a comfort, even Trump-related differences can never diminish them.

    • Jerusha says:

      Very sorry for your loss. Ask a cousin or other relative for a copy of the letter, it might bring some comfort. One of DT’s most evil acts-tearing families apart.

    • Rachelina says:

      I’m so sorry for your loss.

    • Aang says:

      Sorry kitten.

    • Ophelia says:

      My condolences, Kitten. Our thoughts are with you and your family.
      I hope you take solace in the happy memories you shared together. Stay well.

    • Anastasia says:

      Oh hon, I’m so sorry! Go easy on yourself, and I hope you find peace.

    • Indiana Joanna says:

      Best wishes, Kitten. Safe travels.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      Hugs, hugs, hugs to you, Kitten. I’m so sorry for your loss. Take your time to grieve and mourn. Be good to you.

    • Anniefannie says:

      @ kitten ( hugs!) I’m so very sorry for your loss but glad you can reflect on happy memories!
      If it’s any help, Dr Ford is delivering unshakable, unimpeachable and more than credible testimony. My guess is the Republicans are going to deeply regret this
      hearing….

    • paranormalgirl says:

      I’m so sorry for you loss, Kitten.

    • Nona says:

      Aw, Kitten … my heart goes out to you. Sending you white light and peace.

    • Lady D says:

      Condolences, Kitten. I am sorry.

    • Diana says:

      So sorry for your loss, Kitten. 😔

    • Amelie says:

      Kitten the same thing happened to me this summer. My uncle was not exactly a Trump supporter but he voted for him (he supported Ben Carson during the Republican primaries!!) because he hated Hillary with the fury of a thousand suns. He reposted despicable things from Infowars and Breitbart on his Facebook page. He was so childish and unfriended me, my mom, and my sister because we didn’t follow his Facebook page. I distanced myself emotionally from him. He wasn’t a bad guy per se, but his politics were abhorrent.

      He passed away suddenly this past July from complications of a stroke. I wasn’t able to go to the funeral for many reasons and I was heartbroken that I couldn’t, mostly because I wasn’t there to support my mother. When I first heard he was not doing well, I thought “I don’t care, I’ve moved on from this Trump Fox loving nut job.” I was just numb. However when he deteriorated is when my brain woke up and I realized we were on the verge of losing him.

      So I know exactly what you’re going through. It’s almost easy to forget my uncle’s politics while he was alive. He had many good points too–he was a loving grandfather and helped out his daughter A LOT with her son among other things. But it’s so difficult to lose a family member, especially when you were at odds when they died.

    • Elizabeth Rose says:

      So sorry for your loss, Kitten.
      Family can be so messy sometimes and as much as we try to remain resolute based on principles, at the end of the day, there’s always a lot of grey and there can be a whole lotta love in that great area.
      Sending you love and strength.

    • otaku fairy... says:

      I’m sorry, Kitten. It’s easy to see how those conflicting feelings can be had about someone.

    • isabelle says:

      Kitten, sorry for your loss, you are a big part of this board its humbling to read about your lose. We can still love and care deeply for those we politically disagree with & especially those members we love and grew up loving. Don’t beat yourself up over the letter. It is so common to look at recent things we have done out of anger after someone has passed but its not the totality of the how we loved that person, it was just moment.

  11. sayrah says:

    Wow. No wonder people don’t come forward when this is the kind of questioning that happens. I heard yesterday that reports of sexual assault have risen lately partly because of the people who say “why didn’t she say anything long ago?”

  12. Diana says:

    I’m at work and not in a place where I could discreetly watch this. Is Kavanaugh in the room too?

    • Louisa says:

      No. The one request of Dr. Ford’s that the GOP actually respected was that she not be in the same room as him.

  13. megan says:

    She sounds very believable.

    I’m pissed we are even having to go thru this. If Feinstein had shared the letter earlier, maybe Kavanaugh would have been persuaded to withdraw his nomination before this entire cart and pony show. This is awful for our country, and for Dr Ford having to go thru this publicly is shameful.

    • Jan90067 says:

      I don’t think so. With all the senators’ statements that they are “going through with this vote regardless”, it was always goin got be a foregone conclusion. The FBI MUST’VE found things like this, as those POS Senators had that list of 65 women ready to go. They KNEW. FBI’s job is just to gather the info and give it. Not to pass judgment. Dump and his RepubliTHUGS are the ones trying to have buried it.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      Feinstein was asked to keep it confidential in the letter. She would have violated Dr. Ford’s trust if she had shared. I think early on Dr. Ford though there might be a way to get that information considered without having to make her name public.

  14. Maria says:

    I don’t think Brett K is in the room, probably in another room watching it on tv. This woman comes across as totally credible and very smart. I so admire her.

    • Louisa says:

      Do you think he feels any remorse watching and listening to her recount the horror of that day? I am so curious what his wife feels like watching it.
      Not sure why I expect either of them to have any human emotion though. I’m sure they are just furious he has to go through this and isn’t already sitting on the SC.

    • K2 says:

      He’s not in the room. One of her conditions was that she did not have to be in the same room as her attacker.

      The look her lawyers exchanged when the cockwomble claimed the details for the hearing had been worked out with them was extraordinarily telling.

  15. tealily says:

    I can’t believe anyone would suggest to her that she’s misremembering who attacked her (and the suggestion that it was a look-alike??). This is pathetic. I’m fuming.

    • Derriere says:

      What’s really sick is that someone identified the lookalike who then had to refute that statement, because, surprise surprise! Not everyone wants to be known as a rapist and certainly don’t want to take the fall for Kavanaugh.

  16. Incredulous says:

    No-one can possibly walk that far! LIAR!

  17. Digital Unicorn says:

    I’ve been dipping in and out of the live feed on HuffPo and its difficult – Dr Ford is an amazing woman.

    The outside lawyer is awful, the tone of her questioning is patronising and she is treating Dr Ford like she’s a liar and criminal. Shocking. It feels like she’s setting Dr Ford up.

  18. Incredulous says:

    You’re whingeing Chuck, stop whingeing Chuck.

  19. Janet says:

    The worst part for me is that people don’t even know what constitutes rape (or assault, etc). They are prepared to believe she had sex with this man, but don’t understand that a dude suffocating a girl and trying to tear ger clothes off IS assault.

    • jwoolman says:

      The only reason she wasn’t raped was that she managed to escape. How does this make the assault less serious?

      If someone is assaulted with obvious intent to injure but gets away before their kidneys are damaged – is it really not a big deal?

  20. Sam says:

    I’m convinced now more so than ever that Kavanaugh will be confirmed.

    The Republicans believe Dr Ford, they just don’t care. Good luck to the women of America.

    • LB says:

      yep, that about sums it up. I am broken and sickened. I give up.

      • Alarmjaguar says:

        Don’t give up! Take a break and refresh, but we must keep fighting, for ourselves, for our children, for the future! Hugs

      • Tiffany :) says:

        Take time to nurture yourself, but please don’t give up. We’re in this together, LB. We have your back. We’ll be here when you are rested and feel ready to get back in the fight.

      • em says:

        No giving up! Solidarity, ladies.

    • tealily says:

      Yeah, we’re acting like this all matters. It doesn’t.

      • Alarmjaguar says:

        It does matter! Look how many of us are watching and saying enough. I know conservatives are watching, too, because they are all on FB whining about how liberals are lying about their leaders. They are scared that we will change things and we will

  21. Incredulous says:

    Keep getting owned, Chuck, you’re whingeing again.

  22. Keaton says:

    Chuck Grassley is coming across worse than anyone in these proceedings. He’s a whiny, bitchy, defensive, raging idiot. All he seems to care about is 1) defending the way the GOP handled this nomination process and the accusations against Kavanaugh and 2) attacking Democrats. Geez. Shut up Chuck.

    Rachel Mitchell is slyly trying to discredit Dr Ford by implying she had other reasons for her anxiety, implying she lied about her fear of flying, etc. But the 5 minute format and Chuck’s stupid interruptions are harming the GOP’s attempt to smear Dr Ford (thank goodness). So far this is a debacle for the GOP (that’s probably why ol’ Chuckie seems so unhinged)
    Man oh man, we really need term limits.

    Last point: If Kavanaugh comes across as a lying robot I think there’s a real chance Trump may drop him. The one thing Trump understands well is TV and Dr Ford is coming across as credible on TV.

    • Digital Unicorn says:

      I think the Republican are now seeing that using outside counsel to question for them was a bad idea, the Dems have been brill at the way they’ve been handling it and from what I’ve seen they’ve ALL stated that there should be an FBI investigation and the Judge should be called to testify. They have been respectful while the Rep lawyer is looking like a mean bully who is trying to setup Dr Ford, esp as it looks like she’s failing. Dr Ford is a very very credible witness and everyone in the room and watching it can see it.

      They may get what they want but it will cost them at mid terms and I think they are only just realising that they have turned the women of the US against them.

  23. Ksweet says:

    She is supremely believable as I knew she would be. Reading these comments makes me furious for what we’ve all endured (yes, #metoo) and continue to endure in this patriarchal, misogynist society. My heart goes out to all of you, and especially to the brave Dr. Ford. If they think for one minute they are going to vote this awful excuse for a judge onto the Supreme Court without consequences, they have another think coming. I think they have no idea what they will unleash if they go forward with him.

  24. Lala11_7 says:

    I’ve been crying non-stop…all morning…

    My co-worker….

    No…my FRIEND…came up to me to say good morning and say I looked nice today…AND I BURST INTO TEARS AND FELL INTO THAT POOR WOMAN’S ARMS!!!

    I’m just LEANING into all of these emotions…I don’t give a —- if the tears come, they will come…I don’t have the usual energy I have to maintain a cool…calm facade…

    I’m too tired….

    • Alarmjaguar says:

      Hugs, LaLa! I’ve had to really step back and only check in periodically today, it is so hard. Dr. Ford is so brave, but so are all of us.

      • Lady D says:

        I’m totally avoiding watching TV today. There is nothing I can do about or for Dr. Ford today other than trying to send her hope through the airwaves. I can probably send her a card, although I don’t know if it will mean much as support coming from another country, but I can thank her for her courage and flat out guts trying to make her country and the planet safer for all women. I hate that she has to go through this corrupted fiasco today to do it.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      Oh, Lala

      I want to cradle you in my arms and cry with you! I’ve cried 3 times today before I got to work, and now I am trying to hold it together. I tried to talk to my boyfriend, but I ended up saying something trite like “i’m sad today”…which in now way encompasses this storm of emotions inside me. I feel like you get it. Words fail me today, but tears, they sum it all up.

    • Nona says:

      Hugs, Lala! Let it out, darling.

  25. ladida says:

    So proud of her and so grateful, so so so so grateful for her courage.

  26. Valerie says:

    The fact that victims are required to remember every detail of their assault, down to what they were wearing, and account for every millisecond, makes no sense inside or outside of a courtroom. Do you remember exactly how every encounter you’ve had in your life went? Why is it that we expect people to have a perfect memory when we know that it may fail us in even the most ordinary circumstances? When we encounter trauma, our brain responds in a different way than to something minor like burning our dinner or some minor inconvenience. This is life-changing.

    I believe her.

    • paranormalgirl says:

      I can’t even remember my husband’s birthday or half of what we talked about last night. The human brain does not generally remember things in a file cabinet like format. We remember snippets of things, and from those snippets, we create the picture of what occurred. We remember WHAT occurred, but not necessarily all of the small details. That’s why eyewitness accounts are often so unreliable.

  27. Jerusha says:

    How is she supposed to remember EXACT dates and times from 35 years ago? I can’t remember what I had for dinner last Saturday. I know that’s a ridiculous comparison, but when a horrific thing happens you may remember the overall event while being fuzzy on tiny details.

    • virginfangirl says:

      I agree. I had a really scary interaction with a carpenter when I was a house painter of new homes. I can’t remember the year, nor where the new home was located. I can only remember the time of year because I know I was wearing shorts so it must have been summer. So yeah, I agree fully that it’s completely understandable that she doesn’t remember exact dates.

    • Deedee says:

      Yes. I was in a car accident in the 90s. I know it happened. I’m sure there’s a record somewhere of when and where and how, but I’ve moved on and put that wreck behind me. I can’t remember what I wore, the intersection where it happened, the make, color or model of the car that t-boned me, the date or the time. I’ve never told some of my closest friends about it. But I know it happened and I remember the pain. Don’t we try to put painful, traumatic events in the rearview mirror as self-preservation?

  28. Ophelia says:

    Watching this with my sister and she shared something she never shared before.

    She was the first one in our family to go to college. She’s always been a bright girl (now a brilliant woman!). She was accepted into uni when she’s not yet fifteen and had to have an elder student chaperone in class and in the dorms. This I know.

    What I didn’t yet know whas how the scholarship giver and the uni went an extra mile to keep her safe in uni, especially the dorms. Putting her in the closest room to security and dorm supervisor’s room, having dorm leaders check on her, even warning everyone in the dorm building that she’s a minor, and should not be given alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, and no innuendoes or sexual advances. That last bit shocked us, that the dormitory matron needed to remind people not to approach my sister “in that way”. Because apparently consent means nothing and they all needed to be scared off by the word minor.

    Her girl friends sneaked her in everywhere, most times uni ID was enough to get past security.

    They sneaked her in not to lead her astray but to make her into their “designated sober person”, to keep an eye on things. To make sure no one swap the drinks, put drugs, or assault them. She used to “save” her friends by telling the boys she’ll snitch on them saying that they’re trying to “mislead her” if they didn’t let go of their friends.

    (There were times when those boys (and she said one guest lecturer from out of state) made approaches to her too–as though she was a thrill, or a forbidden fruit on a dare).

    She said truthfully that back then she used to hate her friends for making her into a guard dog, and be jealous of her friends having boyfriends or kissing each other or drinking alcohol while she couldn’t, and by being unpopular for threatening a lot of boys off her friends, but recently in light of the experiences of Dr Ford and Julie Swetnick and others, she had her friends come out to thank her.

    Being a minor helped a lot because even when they have in their peabrain minds normalized non-consent, they’re still afraid of going to jail for touching a minor.

    It just scares me how they’re like: oh girls, they want it. But not that one cuz even if that one wants it, she’s still statutory rape.

  29. Ladiabla says:

    Listening to coverage on NBC, why the F* is Meghan Kelly anchoring?!!!! What is this?! Get her b* ass back to Fox where she belongs

    • virginfangirl says:

      Agree. All summer when I saw her face come on the TV for her show, I changed the channel. She’s so fake.

  30. Christin says:

    Hatch (the penny picker-upper from LP’s comment yesterday) leaves the room and describes Dr. Ford to a reporter as “attractive” and “pleasing”.

    Keep showing us who you are!

  31. Janet says:

    This poor woman was sold out by the dens. If it has been brought forward he never would have been choosen. Trump didn’t really want him but he was convinced by others. The dems used her to get what they wanted a way to delay the process. This whole thing is really sick

    • Tiffany :) says:

      The dems didn’t use her, they helped her. You know who is really selling her out? The GOP Senators that are dismissing her claims and trying to gaslight her.

    • notasugarhere says:

      Janet what’s with re-writing history? KavaNot was not on the original list put forward by the right wing conservative group picking Trump’s judges. Trump added him later especially as KavaNot has stated repeatedly that a sitting president is above the law.

    • I saw someone on twitter spewing this conspiracy theory about the Dems setting her up. You sound as crazy as trump.

  32. Incredulous says:

    Lindsey Graham busy burning himself alive right now. I’d link but you probably don’t want to know right now.

    • Giddy says:

      That was incredibly awful. What a damn fool!

    • otaku fairy... says:

      I’m just so disgusted by Lindsey Graham’s tantrum today- but also a little scared. First of all, even if republicans do decide to make false allegations as retaliation for Brett Kavanaugh, that’s not on the victims for coming forward, and that’s not on those of us who believe and support them. That’s on whatever republicans are amoral and vile enough to do something like that. They’ll become exactly what they’ve always insisted women are: Vindictive, politically-motivated, lying attention-seekers deciding to ruin lives because they didn’t get their way.

    • JayneBirkinB says:

      So, just putting this out there, but monitoring my FB feed tonight, my conservative friends are posting the excerpt of Graham’s tirade. But….it’s all perception. They see it as cathartic! Finally, someone has said out loud what they are thinking. That this is a grand left wing conspiracy to railroad an honest man. Yes, that’s what they think, that is what we are up against. Graham played to his crowd in the online gallery, and it worked.

      Everyone: please, please, pleeeeeeeeeease reach out to the undecided and independent voters that you know and persuade them to vote Blue in November. Just give the Dems a chance to right the ship, before Trump tanks the economy, tanks women’s rights, and gets more people killed through malignant policies.

  33. CK says:

    I hope whatever dirt anyone in DC has on Graham is dumped soon. F*ck that man.

  34. JRenee says:

    This is making me physically sick to my stomach. My heart aches at the way they are treating her.

  35. Sayrah says:

    Jesus of course they needed a female to question her. It’s still awful.

    • Digital Unicorn says:

      Dr Fords lawyers do NOT like the Rep lawyer – she is def interrogating her like its a trial. They are trying to make out that she leaked the letter to the press.

      • Incredulous says:

        Yeah I reckon she got some more aggressive questions during the break as the first lot were clownshoes bad.

  36. Jerusha says:

    Ms. Mitchell does not seem very effective. Will she be the R’s mouthpiece when Kavanaugh is on or will the Dickless Wonders find their voices because they’ll be dealing with one of their own?

  37. Incredulous says:

    This Mitchell lady keeps not saying alleged in front of the incident. Hmmmmm….

    • Christin says:

      I think she realized the gig was up in her final segment. Mitchell may also suspect she’ll be the blamed for how badly this looks for the 11 gop men who wouldn’t do their own questioning.

      L. Graham had a hissy fit in the hallway. Funny how they find their voice when a bunch of reporters and cameras are around.

    • Veronica S. says:

      It’s technically legal precedent to refer to a crime as alleged before sentencing, but she’s still shady AF. All of the interviews with her former colleagues basically have them saying they’ve got no idea why she agreed to this.

  38. minx says:

    I can’t watch or listen to it, thanks for the recap from a sympathetic source.

  39. stacey says:

    I’ve been beaten by my ex boyfriend multiple times over the years. Assaults can happen in a blink of an eye and there are moments you just can’t recall – it’s chaos and I swear your mind will black out during an assault as a way to protect you. It is an sensory overload during an assault.

    And no we don’t always report, we don’t always go to the hospital but it doesn’ t mean it didn’t happen. What do these awful men want from us?! I just dont understand why as women we face so much violence, and then are expected to be evidence specialists and basically expected by MEN in POWER to prosecute our own crimes in criminal court and the court of public opinion! These men have daughters, sisters and mothers and they should all be ashamed of themselves when they don’t stand by a victim. Enough is enough!

  40. Save Mueller says:

    I’m trying to keep up on the c-span livestream but the callers they are allowing on air are AWFUL and I might have to turn it off just because of them.

  41. angry bird says:

    We deserve better representatives. Vote this batch of ethically-challenged grifters out on their asses.

  42. sg says:

    1st – Lindsay Graham has LOST HIS MIND!!! What a disgusting excuse for a senator he is now. 2nd – just because I am losing my mind…how do you NOT believe Dr Ford? Yet, my friends (and relatives) on fb are either saying she is set up by democrats, a total liar or saying there is no reason Kavanaugh should be judged by what he did so many years ago (except, of course, he denies doing anything)! I was sexually assulted many years ago….I do not remember every little detail, the exact date, how old I was (though I could figure it out, just don’t want to)…to have people question Dr Ford for lack of this knowledge, they have no clue! I thank you guys, I come here to get my mind back from my family.

  43. Lila says:

    I just came back from a long walk after Dr Ford’s testimony, It was mentally exhausting to hear her story. Too me, Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s courage is making our country come to terms with itself. What are our values? How should we treat each other/ What kind of behavior should we expect from our elected representatives?. This hearing is about so much more than Kavanaugh. Finally, for Senator Lindsey Graham and Senator Chuck Grassley response, I think it fell on deaf ears. Oh yeah,its time for them to retire

  44. Jerusha says:

    Kavanaugh’s on. Pugnacious little bastard. Doesn’t he know he has a microphone? Stop the yelling.

    • Derriere says:

      I just can’t stomach this.

    • Mc says:

      Such an angry old man, ready to pass the blame. He’s so gross. I’m turning it off.

      • Jerusha says:

        Hard to stomach, but I’m looking forward to Harris, Booker and a couple of others tearing him a new one.

    • Christin says:

      But it’s all about him and his family!

      Looks like it doesn’t necessarily take alcohol to bring out the obnoxious.

      Will someone ask him about his wingboy Mark, and why he hasn’t hauled him in from his hiding place to personally testify on his behalf?

    • Alyse says:

      He’s doing this for Trump. This is how Trump would act. Angry.

      Oh no, now the tears and bringing up his 10 year old daughter.

      • Crassino Royale says:

        Right??? Im like….NO HE DIDN’T!! NO he didn’t tell a 10 yr old about sexual assault and oh my word the condescending tone from the doughy moda…Yo. It is ladies night. I want him sacked today, thursday, ladies night. BRING IT WOMEN!!!!!!

      • Beth says:

        Trump didn’t like Kavanaughs weak, choir boy interview on Fox News, and I believe this anger, and blaming the left and the media is all for Trump

  45. Incredulous says:

    Your ugly is showing, Brett.

  46. stacey says:

    His entitlement is rich! He is practically spitting with rage defending himself. We aren’t stupid and we can all see he is lying through his teeth. What I can’t believe is that he is straight LYING to the senate committee. He completely lacks a moral compass and has NO right to be a judge let alone a Supreme Court Judge!!

    When these accusations came to light, he should have accepted his TIME IS UP and RETIRED and went away quietly to live out the rest of his life. Instead, he thought his white privilege would carry him through all the way to the Supreme Court. NO WAY

    • Indiana Joanna says:

      He can’t believe a woman is challenging him. Of upending his narrative of the choir boy, the excellent student, the Yale student, the member of an elite judiciary.

      He’s lying. And blubbering like a lying idiot.

    • Derriere says:

      Does Brett not understand that he wasn’t in the national spotlight until this nomination?
      Does he not understand that he doesn’t deserve the SCOTUS seat? Even if he is qualified, it’s not something that can just be handed to him?

      Yes, all your friends and peers may have been into the same debaucherous activities but…it wasn’t okay then and it’s not okay now! He could have continued his career as a federal judge and retired. But they always want more.

      Stop the crocodile tears, Brett.

    • JayneBirkinB says:

      He did this to show Trump that he’s a fighter – and it worked! Trump tweeted his support this afternoon. The old rules of judicial restraint don’t apply anymore. Vote, so we can restore them!!!!

  47. Tallia says:

    I cried during her description of the event. I absolutely believe her and I am appalled at the Senate Judiciary Committee Republicans. Shame.

  48. Incredulous says:

    Too rote, dude, your tells are showing. This guy is toast.

  49. Anna says:

    He’s barely controlling his emotions, swallowing his tears but his hands are perfectly steady. It’s really visible when he drinks water.

  50. Jerusha says:

    Well, if I had kept a calendar and attended a drunken blowout, I would DEFINITELY document that I had assaulted someone! Wouldn’t you?

  51. virginfangirl says:

    Why does he assume the party was on a weekend, in the summer, when kids all off 7 days a week.

  52. buckley says:

    So far, this doughy pervert has cried more during opening statements than Dr. Ford.

    • Beatrix says:

      Lots of sniffling, no tears. His wife does look genuinely pained, and I feel for her, as she is not responsible for her husband’s actions. This is a clear case of a privileged white private school/frat boy who got away with his misdeeds for years and thought of them as normal rites of passage at the time. He never thought he would have to confront these actions and maybe only recently might have begun to think of those actions as wrong. No sniffling will erase the truth of what he did. I am ashamed of our country’s leadership over the past two years and where we find ourselves today.

      • Arpeggi says:

        Yeah, he’s a bad actor trying to pretend-cry. He sniffles hopping that ppl will take this for actual crying.

        Eurgh, makes me want to punch my laptop, he’s so gross!

  53. phlyfiremama says:

    Dr. Ford has been..just..heartbreakingly authentic and real, and so incredibly brave. As for everyone else, I just want to commit unspeakable crimes against them for their utterly abysmal failure. Failure at EVERY single level~personal, social, and professional. To make HER the criminal instead of the victim for something that isn’t even a trial is beyond wretched. Congratulations, America, just when you thought we couldn’t get any g-damn LOWER, what do you know~lower we go. I am just filled with unspeakable rage, having been the victim at various times of sexual assault & harassment in the military. #triggered

  54. PodyPo says:

    Why is Kavanaugh sniffing like Trump? Is he trying to pretend he is crying for sympathy? Liar liar!

    • Syd says:

      It’s a normal response to finally being held accountable for being an entitled asshole for his entire life.

  55. Incredulous says:

    This dude is making Trump look hinged, WTF?

  56. Derriere says:

    Hold up…He just said that he wants a different system of judging for men than women. This b….

  57. Natalie S says:

    Kavanaugh is a trainwreck. This is not a person sound enough to be on the Supreme Court. And Trump likes anger but he doesn’t like tears so who knows how he’s taking this.

    Compare Dr. Ford’s bravery to Kavanaugh’s hysterics.

    • Veronica S. says:

      I know, that’s part of what’s infuriating about it. These f*ckers are literally the same people who will call women hysterical and irrational.

  58. Crassino Royale says:

    I cannot stand Bread and his sobbing disgrace of a face. Ooooh he tears up at the memory of his bros, booohoooo. My momma was a good person boooofriggin’hooo. Please. People, look at Bread’s wife’s face. Says it all.
    She pissed: She KNOWS who he is.

  59. Jerusha says:

    So those senile old farts are going to hide behind Mitchell again???

  60. Christin says:

    Please get through that binder of “woe is wonderful me”, Bart O’Sniffy.

    He brought his parents and wife (and another blonde) for front row sympathy.

    ***Why does he constantly stick his tongue against his right jaw? ***

  61. Beth says:

    Jeesh, Brett! There’s no need to shout, just use your damn microphone. If this guy gets this emotional and screams, cries, and thinks every left-leaning citizen is out to get him and his family, maybe this job isn’t for him. Someone get Cryin’ Kavanaugh some tissues

    But it was only light beer! I never blacked out! STFU, Bawling Brett. You’re done

    • stacey says:

      Only light beer! And I never have forgotten anything while I was drunk!

      Who does this idiot think he’s kidding? To be honest, i’m shocked he has made this far as a judge and am horrified he has been a judge this long!

      Donald Trump doesn’t mind liars, but I have a feeling he doesn’t like cry babies so I wouldn’t be surprised if Donald turns on him tomorrow hehe…

  62. Jerusha says:

    He’s gone totally psycho under Feinstein’s questioning.

    • Incredulous says:

      Harris and Kolbacher will take his face off.

    • Indiana Joanna says:

      He is appealing to drump’s base and the Republicans. He’s threatening catastrophe for everyone if he isn’t confirmed. Crying, yelling at and talking over Dem Sen. Feinstein. He is enraged at the Democrats who he blames. Terrified that his white middle aged privileged has been changed forever.

      He threw his buddy Mark Judge under the bus. He knew him because they went to Dame school. Judge is/was an addict.

      He wanted to bypass due process by having a meeting the day after allegations. But refuses to say he wants an FBI investigation.

      • testosteroni says:

        Threatening catastrophe for everyone if they don’t shut up and let him get away with assault? Where have I Matt “Scorched Earth” Damon seen that before?

  63. Crassino Royale says:

    Oh boy, it’s ON. He is interrupting Ms. Mitchell, laughing at her questions. In short, being a complete a-void. Yep, that’s the entitlement and white male give a f…kness oozing outta him. Bread! Yo! Everyone’s watching. You acted the truth. You did it, we know.

  64. Lucy says:

    So let me get this right, they drank beer?

  65. Digital Unicorn says:

    He’s a terrible witness, he’s lost composure (not that he had it to begin with). This is not going well for him and this anger and aggressive behaviour toward the Dems is making him look guilty.

    His misogyny is on display in the way he’s behaving toward Ms Mitchell and Sen Feinstein.

    • Veronica S. says:

      He’s trying to make himself out to be the outraged innocent. You know. The same thing they criticize minorities for doing when they’re dealing with actual human rights violations.

  66. Gem says:

    this guy is too emotional for the supreme court!
    Kaiser, god knows I don’t always agree with you but your political coverage (such as it is on a gossip site) is right on. Your twitter is fab too.

  67. Ali says:

    Jaw literally dropped in his response about Mark Judge to Leahy.

  68. Incredulous says:

    The petulant toddler act is pathetic.

  69. Sam says:

    He is hysterical. He came in like a bull in a china shop, I am not sure that this is a wise strategy. I was laughing at the way he let go of his wife’s hand when he reached his seat. He’s unhinged and cannot believe his actions are being questioned for the first time in his life.

    • Digital Unicorn says:

      But Trump is supposedly loving it and thats all that matters to him and GOP.

      • CK says:

        He’s giving a performance for Trump, which keeps his nomination from being withdrawn. He’s not giving a performance for Collins or Murkowski, who are now privy to what an unhinged conspiratorial lunatic he is, and that ultimately will probably keep him from being confirmed by the full senate barring some ConservaDems acting like jackasses.

  70. phlyfiremama says:

    “lying to the FBI means criminal prosecution” UNLESS you are a government official.

  71. Incredulous says:

    Durbin just savaged Kavanaugh. Also, since my last comment didn’t make it through, I just want to reiterate that Grassley is an odious fistula.

  72. Harryg says:

    Oooh Lindsey Graham suddenly went all James Stewart-wannabe. Fascinating pompous act.

  73. Arpeggi says:

    Can Lindsay Graham go away?!? I never was a fan, but now I’m starting to think McCain’s gone too soon; I’m sure his buddy Graham would not act like such a sycophant if he was still around

    • jwoolman says:

      I wonder if McCain had been able to protect Graham against blackmail? I would suspect Trump is the blackmailer, possibly bolstered by Putin’s cybercollected dirt. Trump’s general approach in the past has been to bribe or threaten to get his way. McCain might have been able tp threaten to spill things he knew if his friend was bullied.

  74. stacey says:

    Brett Kavanaugh is just so unlikeable.

    Has anyone else noticed his strange facial twitch/nose scrunching?

  75. Ktae87 says:

    I want to punch Cornyn in the face

  76. Remy Red says:

    The contrast between Ford’s straightforward answers and Kavanaugh’s spiel is so telling.
    And f-ck these old white apologists.

  77. Incredulous says:

    That was a bunch of perjury Kavanaugh just did. Again.

  78. Ktae87 says:

    Klobuchar is savaging him about not wanting to reopen the FBI investigation

  79. Mary says:

    As an MST survivor who never reported, I feel so, so defeated, heartbroken, and furious with Kavanaugh’s testimony

  80. CK says:

    Imagine the public crucifixion Dr. Ford would have been put through if she was as unhinged as that monster is now. I have no tears or sympathy for that unhinged partisan nutjob.

  81. Natalie S says:

    Graham is compromised in some way. I don’t know if it’s Putin or US-based but there’s something wrong here.

    • stacey says:

      Yes he needs to be looked at himself.

      • Bella says:

        A lot of people on Capitol Hill think Graham wants to be Attorney General and that’s why he’s buddying up to Trump when he was a vocal opponent of Trump during the Republican primaries and even somewhat during the 2016 General Election campaign. And knowing Senator McCain isn’t around to disapprove probably makes Graham think he can pull this BS off.

    • Chaine says:

      I think it’s fairly openly whispered that he may not be 100% red-blooded American male heterosexual. I couldn’t give a rat’s a** but his conservative South Carolina base sure would. There’s probably somebody that’s holding that over him.

      • Natalie S says:

        I know the answer to someone like Graham is “No”, but isn’t Lindsey rich enough at this point to walk away from the Senate? He can resign like Paul Ryan and all the other Republicans trying to get as far away as possible from this. Graham would rather golf with Trump and provide cover for someone like Kavanaugh? It makes me think that he must have broken the law somehow.

  82. K2 says:

    If they believed he was innocent, even before they heard her speak, they’d have had Mark Judge in there like a shot. They’ve all gone to great lengths to keep him out of the process, and unavailable to questions. They don’t even have the time factor excuse there, as they do with an FBI inquiry.

    The pretence that they think he didn’t do this is just offensive.

    • jwoolman says:

      They’re afraid Mark Judge won’t lie under oath. He got sober (I suspect Kavanaugh never did and is either an alcoholic or a heavy drinker now as well as in high school and college). And he remorsefully admitted participation in a gang rape of a drunk (maybe drugged) girl to his ex-gf. He didn’t think of it as rape, but he knew it was wrong. If he has any recollection of what they did to Ford, he’s likely to spill it under oath. But the two boys were very drunk,, so their memories may be a bit fuzzy. But it was quite deliberate. She was just going to use the bathroom and they pushed her into the bedroom and locked the door.

  83. phlyfiremama says:

    WHY doesn’t Mitchell get to question Kavanaugh???

    • Incredulous says:

      He was atrocious at answering her softball questions, pretty sure she thinks he’s guilty (he is) and the Reps on the committee need to sturm und drang so they don’t look as bad as they are.

  84. Jerusha says:

    Any news on the Rosenstein/Lardass meeting? Did it even take place?

  85. Nic919 says:

    This guy is not exhibiting the temperament required to be a judge. When he started ranting about the left and the Clintons that was it for me. These women are not political operatives. It’s obvious after hearing Dr. Blasey Ford. He’s never going to rule in favour on anything that comes from the Democrats and that’s not the purpose of a judge. I had to change the channel after a while because it’s disturbing to see such an entitled man baby even get this far and he’s reacting like the spoiled brat that he is. The GOP senators all need to lose their positions. They are despicable.

    • Harryg says:

      He is arrogant and entitled and not suited to be a judge.

    • Indiana Joanna says:

      He was never going to be a non-partisan SCOTUS. He is so personally aggrieved. So smug in his attitude that an entitled Catholic prep has only the best people. So sure that the mantle of his Yale years would cover up his assaults and belligerent drunkeness.

      He is drump’s man, bought and paid for.

      Now he saying his whole life is changed because his narrative has been challenged.

  86. Ktae87 says:

    Rage inducing eye twitch has commenced. All of these doughy white boys covering for each other. VOTE THEM OUT

  87. Roxi says:

    Off topic: I just want to say how much I love my fellow Celebitchies. I read the site almost every single day. What an informed , educated, worldly group we are here. I learn things from people in different professions and with different life experiences. The commentary here is not shallow simple gossip but insightful and reasoned analysis… along with delicious biting additions! Thank you all for being my go-to website, just after the news :) ))

    • Mary says:

      Second that….this feels like a safe place (even though I never comment otherwise) and I am so thankful for that

    • Mc says:

      Amen! I’m going to lose a few friends after this week because I refuse to put up with their blind trump / gop support anymore. Thank goodness for celebitchy readers. I think y’all are the only normal left people in this bizarro-trump world.

  88. boredblond says:

    Evidently he and loathsome lindsay took the same ‘I’m so enraged/hissy fit’ lessons..omfg…not sure if I can watch much more of this garbage..

  89. Incredulous says:

    That’s some nice jugular you got in your jaws, Blumenthal.

  90. Lulu says:

    When I was about 15, I had my first metoo moment…I was raped by a 24 year old man. And he was a nice person – he apologised afterwards.
    I don’t know the date…I don’t know the address…I don’t know why he did it or if it was premeditated. Republicans would answer that if I don’t know the details, it can’t have happened.
    But I remember certain details as if it were last night, and not 36 years ago: I know exactly what I was wearing. I know that I begged him to stop. I know that out of the window, I could see my town on the other side of the bay, as the sun was rising. I know what his bed covers looked like. I know who was in the kitchen when I came downstairs. And I know that I didn’t tell anyone in my family, no teachers or counsellors, and certainly not the police.
    I felt quite certain that I had brought it upon myself. It was years and years later during a conversation with a friend that she told me I was describing rape. I used to say that it didn’t matter because it had not had any effect on me.
    Actually, it shaped my life, my expectations, my lack of confidence, my relationships, my parenting, my work. Some things for better, many things for worse.
    The reason I say that the perpetrator ‘was a nice person’ is that I’m pretty sure that’s what people would say about him. That is what Lindsay Graham said about Brett Kavanaugh.
    For me, it’s just not a defence – it’s part of the problem. People who are otherwise nice, sexually assault others. The one thing does not rule out the other.

    • Ktae87 says:

      Lulu, I am so sorry that happened to you. It’s amazing the clarity that we can recall certain details about traumatic events. But not others. I just want to say. I see you, I believe you, and know it was never a reflection on you. I hope you find peace. Sending you love and hugs.

    • Gem says:

      yes @lulu. they are all nice people, fathers, brothers, friends. none of that is relevant.
      I am sorry to hear of your experience. the way you describe it, how you don’t remember some details and how other details are so vivid, this makes sense to me. how survivors of sexual assault are treated is inhumane, as if the threat of a false accusation (which isn’t common at all) is way worse than actual assault. it’s like that thing about how being accused of racism for some people is so much worse than racism itself.
      “I used to say that it didn’t matter because it had not had any effect on me.” That’s exactly how I felt too. And I was so very wrong about that.
      anyway lulu, I believe you and I just want to send virtual hugs your way.

    • Mary says:

      Those GOP f*@k’s just have no idea what it’s like…they have no idea some memories are branded in our minds and others are blocked out as if there were moments of coma. Much love to you.

      • Lulu says:

        Thank you.
        What the metoo movement has done has freed me from feeling in any way responsible for the actions (crimes) of this man.
        This comes with an overwhelming realisation that because I did not come forward, it is highly possible that others suffered similarly after me. This guilt is real.

      • Juls says:

        LuLu I Know you feel guilty because you think you could have saved someone else the same fate. That is NOT TRUE. Only he is responsible for what he does to other people and it was not your responsibility to stop him. There are A multitude Of scenarios that could have played out if you had reported it and you cannot predict what that outcome could be. Think of it another way: if you had him prosecuted, and he went to prison and killed a prison guard, would you feel responsible for that death? I hope not. Because HE did it, not you. Only him. Peace be with you. Thank you for your courage in telling your story of survival. Hugs and love.

  91. Themummy says:

    I’ve been glued to the tv screen for 8 hours now. Since the moment the hearing started. I was raped when I was 12. I only told my mom when I was in my 30s. I still have not found the bravery to speak publicly about my experience. I feel like it is time and It is important to speak out right now, but every time I even think about speaking out about this, no matter how small a way, I feel sick to my stomach and I start to sweat and my heart races and I feel completely sick.

    I guess I’m just reaching out here in this thread because while I have not been able to tear myself away from what’s happening on the television screen, with every hour that passes I feel more physically overwhelmed with intense sickness and despair. I’ve almost thrown up several times. I’m not expecting anyone here to be my therapy, and I am completely fine, so I guess I just wanted to reach out and a friendly place or discussion about this hearing is going on.

    I really hope that Kavanaugh is not going to be confirmed. The fact that anyone can watch him and actually feel compelled to defend him this morning he’s actually terrifying to me. Also, I hope Lindsey Graham goes to hell.

    • Gem says:

      @Themummy, I am so sorry. I suggest maybe step away from the TV for a bit if you are getting overwhelmed. And please don’t feel that you *have to* speak about your rape, unless you are absolutely ready to. You don’t owe this to anyone, not if you’re not ready. Hugs to you, you are not alone.

      • Themummy says:

        Thank you so much for responding , Gem. ❤️ ( and thank you especially for reading through all of those ridiculous speech to text typos! )

        Walking away is good advice. It’s hard to do, but I probably just need to do it. At least for a little while.

    • Mary says:

      You aren’t alone in how you feel and there is so much love coming your way!! And yes…burn in Hell Lindsey!!

      • cannibell says:

        How Lindsey Graham can look at himself in the mirror in the morning is entirely beyond me.

        @Themummy – take especial care of yourself, and hugs to you. Gem was spot-on, totally co-sign.

  92. Themummy says:

    Dang it. Speech to text typos..

  93. Remy Red says:

    Frat Boy American culture needs to DIE.

  94. Sue Denim says:

    I just want to say a quick thank you to the writing team and all of the commenters here — you all are a source of comfort and support as we navigate together these sad and disturbing times. The hideous one said he was going to drain the swamp and boy are the critters crawling…who knew there were so many of them… Anyway, thank you all, peace…

  95. Harryg says:

    He knows it’s important to drink a lot of water.

  96. Incredulous says:

    Damn, that Booker fella brought the pain. (Also whoever was behind him on the left with a pro death stare)

    • Juls says:

      Booker came to rumble. I was screaming at the dusty old white dems to shut BK down all afternoon. They just let him interrupt, talk over them, and ramble the same incoherent drivel over and over, instead of answering yes/no questions, until their time was up. He was COACHED to do this. His bias alone should disqualify him. Booker was having none of it and shut him DOWN. Then Kamala Harris, AKA the Queen, brought the PAIN when she asked him the same question that he had been asked 20 times, that he refused to answer every time, and she finally stopped him and said “I’ll take that as a no” and kept going. And he didnt refute her, just looked defeated. Because his answer truly WAS no, he just wouldnt say it. I clapped.

      • Indiana Joanna says:

        Senator’s Booker and Harris are incredible. If nothing else comes from this we can take comfort in the brilliance of these senators and their futures.

      • indian says:

        Let’s not idiolise Booker. Waiting for someone to take him to task and kick him out. He blatantly talked about groping a woman without her consent. Just because he spoke the right words today, doesn’t let him off the hook.. let’s not give democrats carte blanche, like we did with Clinton.

  97. elle says:

    Now some f*cker (not sure who, since I can’t watch it… just hearing it from the next room) is asking him whether or not he believes in god and to say before god and country whether or not he did this. Oh, okay… as long as you’re invoking the sky pixie.

    Just whistling to the base.

  98. Incredulous says:

    Based on what I saw of the Republicans during that loooong day, I do truly believe they are dumb enough to try to put Kavanaugh through and burn themselves for November.

    • Christin says:

      They will likely win this battle, but may lose the war.

      Just so sadly partisan and theatrical. Now we see why he was hiding out at the WH for days (acting lessons).

    • Valois says:

      They probably figured getting a conservative SC majority would be worth it even if they might loose their majority over it.

  99. Maria says:

    I was appalled at the way he behaved. I stupidly expected better from a candidate who might be on the Supreme Court. Shouting, bawling, what a horrible man.

  100. Mary says:

    I want to mention, the more I think about it, how maddening it was the GOP hid behind Rachel Mitchell to seem sympathetic to Dr Ford. Just because they had a female posing their questions, DOES NOT CHANGE WHO THEY ARE. They are STILL out of touch, mysogynist, despicable, WHITE MEN who can all go to hell!

  101. Sue Denim says:

    Not to make light of this somber day, but it just hit me — Lindsey Graham is Beverley Leslie from Will & Grace!

  102. Incredulous says:

    A woman has just come forward, inspired by Dr Blasey Ford and announced she was raped by Senator Joe Fain the night of her graduation from Georgetown in 2007. She is determined to no longer live in fear.

  103. Weezer says:

    I gotta admit…I’m in recovery and I know a tiny bit about folks who drink too much… it does a number on your face. And I see my face in his face…and most folks think blackouts mean you’re passed out on the rug. It’s amazing/scary what you can do blacked out and people never have a clue you’re that drunk. It’s a sad day…the world sure can be a hard place for a girl…

    • Lulu says:

      Yes, I’m surprised nobody seems to be commenting on his appearance….he certainly looks like a drinker.
      Well done to you for your recovery!

  104. isadora says:

    Chuck Grassley’s behaviour was idiotic. But Lindsay Graham’s faux outrage took the cake. Man, was he putting on a show for Ol’ dum dum Donny? That was the old man yelling at the sky shtick that Donny loves so much.

    Or that idiotic tweet from Don “the big dunce” Jr ridiculing Blasey-Ford about “selective flying”. And the less about drunk Kavanaugh the better. The American Bar association now retracting their recommendation for BK and calling for an investigation. And still the Repubs want to vote on Friday.

    I hope Dr Ford and all the other women get some sort of justice. We can’t take away the suffering they had to endure but BK not being made a SCOTUS is a good first step.