John Mayer is a sexual & musical legend, according to John Mayer

John Mayer performs in concert at the O2 Arena in London

I never found John Mayer attractive. Not when he first hit the scene and he was doing the sensitive-rocker thing. Not when his image changed to “boyfriend of Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston.” I was appalled that Taylor Swift got with Mayer. I was appalled that Katy Perry got with him too. What do women see in him? Like, at all? I just don’t see it. Anyway, Mayer is still promoting his latest album, and promoting his tour (?) with Dead & Company, the remnants of The Grateful Dead. Which is how we got this new Rolling Stone interview with Mayer. Even though I don’t find him attractive physically, emotionally or intellectually, I’ll admit to perversely enjoying his interviews. He really believes he’s the deepest, most intellectual rocker that ever was. You can read the full piece here. Some highlights:

How Chris Robinson dissed Mayer’s guitar skills: “I care about this band too much to give that life. I have my thoughts, but it’s not my place. I realized not long ago that I’m done debating my own merits: “No, I am very good.” Music isn’t a sports-page thing to me.

Becoming an influence to younger artists like Ed Sheeran and Shawn Mendes. “I didn’t see it coming. We don’t realize that every five years a motherf–ker is born into the world of music. I don’t apply as much from the blues world to my music as I’d like to, but there’s a lot to be applied from the blues world spiritually on this: Those guys are me. I looked up to Eric Clapton and Stevie Ray Vaughan. All my heroes were awesome to me, so there’s a contract to make the new guys feel accepted.

The change in the pop music landscape: “In a lot of ways, it’s 2003 again, and in a lot of ways it might as well be the year 3000. But what I see right now is that artists care about songs more than they have ever cared about songs. They want them. They want to have written them. You’re seeing this shift back to real fundamentals in songwriting. Ed Sheeran is a huge part of that. He’s really, really serious about songwriting. Ed’s not a guy who goes, “What do you think?” Ed’s in his own thing and he’s a star athlete. He’s also a phenomenal guitar player. His right hand is a monster. So for me, instead of looking at this as if I can’t get the same opportunities Ed Sheeran can get.

How he’s “entering cannabis life.” “I put it where drinking used to go, and the quality of life has gone up considerably. Drinking is a f–king con. How much is enough? Every time I drank, I was looking for some sort of regulated amount. It always feels wrong for me. I always feel like I went overboard. “I said two, now it’s three, now we’re at four?” I never had a serious issue with it, but I remember looking around going, “This feels rigged. I’m taking a break. There’s never an amount that felt like I was succeeding at life. It always felt wrong.

His “Guitar-face”: “Guitar face is not cool. I feel a little bit uncomfortable with people thinking that I made up the guitar face. God, wouldn’t it be great to go to the jungles of Borneo and give a tribe Fender Stratocasters and have them listen to Jimi Hendrix – but not show them Jimi Hendrix – and come back five years later and see if there’s any guitar face? I have a feeling there would be.

How Katy Perry ranked him as her best lover:
“I don’t have a cool-enough thought for you. I’ve hacked this game. I pay very little of the price of fame now. I get to play the music that moves me the most. I’m having the time of my life. I’m 39 – I remember 32. I don’t wanna do it again.

[From Rolling Stone]

I love the feeling that I get from Mayer that he really has a sense that he is legendary, that he is the greatest, that talking to him at 39 is like talking to Paul McCartney in his prime or something. Katy Perry ranked him as a better lover than Diplo and Orlando Bloom and Mayer’s answer is “I’ve hacked this game. I pay very little of the price of fame now.” Like he’s FAMOUS for being a great lover. Like, it’s all anyone can talk about. As for Mayer lining himself up with the likes of Eric Clapton and Stevie Ray Vaughan, and saying he’s like that for Ed Sheeran? God help us all. God help rock music if that’s the case.

John Mayer performing at Madison Square Garden

Photos courtesy of WENN and Pacific Coast News.

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34 Responses to “John Mayer is a sexual & musical legend, according to John Mayer”

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  1. Kaye says:

    I agree 100% with you, Kaiser. I can’t abide this pretentious person and I don’t think he’s even remotely attractive.

  2. velourazure says:

    He needs to stop talking.

  3. Louise says:

    Those pictures look like his sex face. ha ha. no thanks!

  4. minx says:

    Never, ever thought he was attractive.

  5. Ruyana says:

    I’ve never heard any of his music, yet I live. Oh, and he is really, really, really NOT attractive!

    • Bella bella says:

      I’ve never heard any of his music either!! He’s a complete black hole to me.

    • Emma says:

      He really is an excellent musician, check out “in your atmosphere” from his live in LA concert (or actually, anything from that concert). He is just a phenomenally talented natural musician. The first time I saw that concert all I felt was envy; I literally thought “that guy has more musical talent in his little finger than I could ever have” (and I have a degree in classical piano performance!)

  6. T.Fanty says:

    I totally believe he is a massive influence on Ed Sheeran. But that isn’t a compliment to either of them.

  7. JA says:

    I feel so ashamed i loved this douche bag my senior year in high school. Shame, shame, shame :-(

    • detritus says:

      Eh, I’d still sit on his face to shut him up. I very much doubt he’d be worthwhile to date though, he’s a trash bang.

    • Keely says:

      I too bow my head in shame, like what the hell was I thinking? In my defence I was clearly young and stupid. I know better now & he’s disgusting.

    • Betsy says:

      Feel no shame. I choose not to think of the crushes I entertained in high school.

      • lala says:

        I’d bone the hell out of him – but I have admittedly horrible, horrible taste in men.

  8. Lucy says:

    Do sit down, boy. A friend of mine cannot for the life of her comprehend why I dislike him so much (she’s obsessed with him, so).

  9. Alp says:

    He’s a hasbeen and looks like a creep.

  10. Gina says:

    Begging to disagree with all of you. I also thought he was a wuss until I watched him play Jimi Hendrix ‘Voodoo Chile’, he plays that like a demon. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=p7-orgHG7CU. He has played with all the blues greats e.g. Stevie Ray Vaughan & Eric Clapton. He’s a brilliant musician (not Songwriter or Recording Artist) Blues Guitarist. In the video link I’ve supplied, he is sexy AF.

    • I Choose Me says:

      That was lit. He really is a good musician.

      Don’t like his personality much but I’ve always thought he was attractive. Less so when he talks.

  11. Char says:

    Ugh, never found him attractive & I can only think of 2 songs he sings. “Your body is a wonderland” & “paved paradise, put up a parking lot” are both him, right? I don’t stop the radio to listen to them, just not my thing. I can’t speak to how he is on the guitar, since I couldn’t care less about him. I find someone like Joe Perry as an amazing guitarist, but other people think he’s overrated, so I guess to each their own.

  12. Bobbysue says:

    I was appalled when Dead & Company got with him.

  13. Lynn says:

    His music is awesome. He might be pretentious. But he delivers the goods.

  14. hogtowngooner says:

    The only good thing I’ll say about him is that he’s a FANTASTIC guitar player. But he’s still gross and his garbage music is SO overrated. Even when all my friends in HS and university swooned over him, I couldn’t stand him.

  15. MrsPanda says:

    I never found him attractive either; and he always ”pings” to me as a sociopath. I feel like there’s something very ”off” about him, which is why I sometimes click on these articles in case they’re announcing the frozen head has finally been found in his freezer.

  16. TrixC says:

    What is he even talking about? Ugghh

  17. TyrantDestroyed says:

    Ewww

  18. em me says:

    When John was 32, he tried to have sex with me. I swiftly (no pun intended) shut him down, but no John, you do not want to go back to 32. You were a mess of a human and an embarrassment to yourself. Katy Perry needs to raise the bar.

  19. Carolina says:

    He’s not saying that he’s famous for being a great lover. He’s saying that he has no comment, because he’s figured out that he doesn’t always have to have one–unlike when he was 32 and thought he could defeat tabloid reporting by being more clever. He could try to do that now–give some quip or a la Diplo, social media update that will be covered by all the tabs and gossip sites–but instead, he’s choosing not to engage with it.