Here are some photos of Pippa Middleton promoting her book, Celebrate, in London yesterday. Guess who designed this awful dress? You’ll NEVER guess. Yes, it’s Stella McCartney. Of course. Because it looks so damn cheap and like whoever designed it has no concept of what flatters a woman’s figure. It’s particularly awful on Pippa’s figure. Personally, I like Pippa’s figure so much more than her sister’s. I think Pippa looks more athletic and less like she’s in the midst of some kind of crash diet. But both Kate and Pippa have very “boyish” frames with extremely slender hips. This is exactly the wrong kind of dress when you don’t have hips – it emphasizes the wrong part of Pippa’s body, and it makes her look thick-waisted. Plus, it looks like she threw on a black dickey on top of a fug dress. Now, I do think her hair & makeup look good – from the neck up, this is the best she’s ever looked, quite honestly.
Anyway, we were sent a preview of this week’s Parade Mag, and it’s basically some selected excerpts from Pippa’s book. I’ll get to the text in a moment, but first you need to take a look at this photo:
OMG. WHY?! Why did you tie strings around donuts and hang them up in a tree?!? Did the donuts do something bad? Were they accused of a crime?
As it turns out, Pippa’s book is full of really dumb ideas. Well… not so much dumb as “obvious.” Parade’s excerpt features Pippa’s Halloween suggestions, which include making pumpkin soup and serving it in a “cauldron”. You could also “string cobwebs on tables; and haunt gardens, attics, and stairways with ghosts made from sheets.” Well, I would have never thought of that!!!! And don’t forget: “Just a simply carved pumpkin lit up among glimmering candles will go a long way to producing the right atmosphere.” OMG BEST ADVICE EVER!! Which is basically the point of the Daily Mail’s hilariously bitchy review of the book, which is brilliantly summed up like this: “Certainly, a few might think that some of what the ambitious younger sister of the Duchess of Cambridge actually writes here must be aimed at some sort of halfwit hostess who has never thrown a party before, can’t bake a potato without laddering her tights and has lost the recipe for making ice.” Poor Pippa. Such a disappointment.
Photos courtesy of Parade and WENN.