Liz Hurley’s evil plot involves turning Shane Warne into orange leather


Orange you glad you clicked on this post? GAH. SO ORANGE. I mean, I love Liz Hurley and Shane Warne together, but all of Shane’s careful skin care is being undone by his extreme tanning, what I’m assuming is a combination of fake-bake spray tans and tanning beds. His skin looks like leather. Orange leather.

Anyway, these are new pics of Shane and Liz in Melbourne, Australia, where they were attending a club opening – the opening of Club 23, “the ultimate private bar and mini casino”. People are calling it “Shane’s bar” but it’s not – according to The Mail, “Warne does not actually own the bar or have any involvement in the running of it as a day-to-day business. Instead, he is merely an ‘ambassador’ of the club, along with professional poker player Joe Hachem.”

Liz donned a bandage dress for the occasion, and I kind of have to give her credit for her evil, Pygmalion Plan to turn Shane into this leathery, frozen, giant-teethed Botox monster – now she looks even better by comparison. Standing next to THAT, she looks even more beautiful. Her skin is gorgeous. As for Shane… his new face is managing to “settle in” a big more, but he still looks ridiculous. I feel kind of bad for him. This is the one of the weirdest and funniest mid-life crises I’ve ever seen.

My favorite part of the photos from this club opening? Tiger Woods was the big “get”. Shane even did photos with him. The British and Aussie papers are trying to make it sound like Shane didn’t want Liz to get near Tiger, lest the Tiger-dong somehow accidentally slip inside Liz. I don’t think Shane has anything to worry about, though. It’s not like Liz is a 20-something HoJo’s waitress (Tiger’s type).

By the by, I still think Liz is doing this whole “loved up and engaged” thing partly because her ex Hugh Grant has just become a father for the first time.





Photos courtesy of WENN.

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16 Responses to “Liz Hurley’s evil plot involves turning Shane Warne into orange leather”

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  1. Blankverse says:

    Was there a buy-one-get-one-free sale on those bandage dresses? Everyone and their dog is wearing them.

  2. brin says:

    Love the pic of Tiger and Shane, do you think they are checking out all the babes they can’t do anymore?

  3. says:

    The skin around his mouth looks painfully red- like he did one too many chemical peels.

  4. Quest says:

    Maybe she likes the Jersey Shore shade of orange.


  5. Linnie says:

    He is so unbelievably gross. I can’t imagine waking up every morning and turning over to see his face next to mine. He would blind you with his overly-whitened teeth, he would be leaving orange skin flakes on the bed, his skin is already pulled so tight it’s ready to crack and his lips are ?what? made of rubber? Ugh. He is repulsive.

  6. El Kiddo says:

    Shane looks like a Ken-Doll. It bugs me.

  7. lin234 says:

    She’s looking incredible. Too bad about her taste in men.

  8. becky says:

    she looks amazing

  9. Nanea says:

    Orange leather seemed to be quite popular for a time when it was used to make Hermès bags…

    Whereas Shane looks… awful.

  10. Stacia says:

    Too late! His face looks like a tinted, tanned and primed leather handbag.

  11. Selena says:

    You’d think when this moron spends so much money on plastic surgery and clothing that he could clean his bloody shoes!!!

  12. gg says:

    He looks like a really bad Ken doll, and I’m tired of her same old makeup. The black liner is tired.

  13. Turtle Dove says:

    Interesting theory about the Hugh baby and Liz and Shane.

    I’m with Blankverse (1) and I too am OVER those bandage dresses. They’re how many seasons ago and they’re still being worn on the carpets?! Enough already.

  14. A Fan says:

    Does he have two different coloured eyes?

  15. Emily says:

    I don’t think there was ever much hope for his skin, he spent hours out in the sun as a cricketer, and I don’t think they’ve made a sunscreen that can withstand a test match.

  16. Laura says:

    YAY. It’s a good day when theres new pics of these two together.